What I believe to be true about happiness
Yesterday was International Day of Happiness (21.03.2023)! So let’s talk happiness, shall we?
It has indeed a very special meaning to me, but I am sure also you, or maybe even all of us. As we all want it. Many of us have found it, or think we have but it could be better, others are still searching, and many saw glimpses, whilst a few may still be in the dark, yet we all have the same goal of being happy.
But what is happiness actually, and how do we get it?
As per ChatGPT it is “like a warm puppy snuggled up on your lap, wagging its tail with joy”. This definition I found very fitting, so we keep it. When I asked it how to get it, I wasn’t as happy with its answer, yet really liked this part: “Happiness is not a destination, but a journey, so enjoy the ride!”
And what a journey it has been for me!
In my eyes, happiness absolutely is not what I was going through back in 2020, the year of burnout, job changes, depression, lockdown, a toxic relationship, and more. I would even say back then it felt like the complete opposite: I was just down, no motivation, no energy, and no joy (or if there was some it was rare and faded quickly underneath the sheer mass of things that weren’t great.)
“How did you get out of this”, you may ask.
Well, despite the struggles, I grasped tightly onto something that gave me strength throughout any hardship in life, even back then during childhood. And this, my friend, was the deep-rooted belief of “I will get out of this and things will get better.” Pairing this with the start of my coaching journey and being coached by wonderful human beings, I found it again, my happiness. Or rather, I worked for it.
Quite literally I shifted my mindset around the current situation, made necessary decisions, and took action because I knew I was deserving of better, of happiness, of loving life, being excited for the day, waking up with a smile on my face, and who is not? Who are you NOT to experience life this way?
With this shift I made new discoveries around happiness, which I will share with you in the list below:
It starts from within, if we don’t acknowledge that we may be unhappy about something and just accept things as is, we cannot get out of it. Happiness needs recognition of what makes us feel bad, unworthy, disappointed, sad,… And it takes us to wake up to this shrill alarm clock going off because it will never stop ringing until we do.
It takes for us to see our worth as important enough to take necessary actions. Whether it may be cutting ties to toxic people, leaving a job where you are not appreciated, or making your well-being and self-care a non-negotiable, because otherwise, your health will deteriorate. Yes, this takes courage, but let me tell you: if you are unhappy in any area of life right now, and there is something you can do about it, let this be your sign and do something about it. Especially if it is scary! Why? Because things will work out, they will work out like you want to, or better. You are not born in this world to suffer, but to flourish!
Happiness lies in purpose, purpose lies in us following our intuition, our gut, what makes us feel good, what lights us up, what makes us jump for joy, has us burst in pride, laugh out loud (even if we sound like little piggies), what makes us feel like flying, like a constant peak experience, whole, liberated and free. Or simply, like ourselves.
Yes, what I believe to be true about happiness, is that if we get to live life as who we truly are and not let fear or outside judgment stop us from our purpose, that is happiness. This may sound big, but it doesn’t have to be. I mean, yes all of these are big things if we are at completely different points of the spectrum, but:
All you need to know is: it is possible.
All you need to do is: take the first step.
All you need to believe is: it gets to be true for you too.
All I wish for you is that you find happiness, in every area of life. It may be a bumpy ride at times, yet the views are spectacular.
So let me leave you with this one question: “When was the last time you were truly happy?”
NamaStay HAPPY
JD
P.S. Happy Ramadan to everyone doing it! May you be well, happy, and peaceful!